Archive for November 2018

Intulexia We can get the mind used to anything

Fraser Trevor

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Title: Intulexia We can get the mind used to anything
Author: Fraser Trevor
Rating 5 of 5 Des:

We can get the mind used to anything: To enjoy eating healthy foods To shun junk food To not need to have alcohol, coffee, sugar, cigare...

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We can get the mind used to anything: To enjoy eating healthy foods To shun junk food To not need to have alcohol, coffee, sugar, cigarettes, drugs To not need to have video games, Youtube/Netflix, news or blogs, porn or social media To stay present and mindful To turn towards feelings instead of avoiding them To be perfectly OK in discomfort This then becomes Intulexia a discourse with the mind. We spend so much of our time and energy avoiding things we don’t like, and trying to get things that comfort us. What if we could train ourselves to not need to avoid uncomfortable things, and not need to run to comforts? We’d be gods. If you go to an uncomfortable social event, instead of needing to avoid, hide, or find a comfort zone … you could just stay in the discomfort and talk to people you don’t know. It wouldn’t be a problem, because you trained your mind to be fine with the discomfort. If you normally have to have your comforts (coffee, sugary foods, soda, TV, alcohol, pot, cigarettes), you’ll spend a lot of money on them, and in many cases worsen your health and your bank account. You might avoid going places where you can’t get these things, and spend a lot of energy to make sure you could have them every day. But what if you trained your mind to not rely on them for comfort and relaxation? You could slowly get the mind used to not needing these, one at a time, so that it would be free.

Intulexia We can get the mind used to anything

We can get the mind used to anything:To enjoy eating healthy foodsTo shun junk foodTo not need to have alcohol, coffee, sugar, cigarettes, drugsTo not need to have video games, Youtube/Netflix, news …

09 Nov 2018

I am so incredibly tired of people portraying protectors as dangerous. Our protectors saved our life.

Fraser Trevor

Link Author

Title: I am so incredibly tired of people portraying protectors as dangerous. Our protectors saved our life.
Author: Fraser Trevor
Rating 5 of 5 Des:

Core: Also known as the original or the original child, the core is considered by some to be the part first born to the body. Some see t...

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Core: Also known as the original or the original child, the core is considered by some to be the part first born to the body. Some see the core as the owner of the system, the part that has the most power and influence over other parts, and the most important part whom the other parts were created to protect. Others see the core as nothing more than the self state that began to integrate sooner than other self states did. There is currently a debate over the existence of cores because it does not easily fit with the theory of structural dissociation. Not all systems have a part that could be identified as a core. 
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Host: The host is the alter who most commonly uses the body. Host alters collectively fall under the category of fronters, or alters who frequently “front” by taking control of the body and the front, conscious part of the mind. Host alters are responsible for most aspects of daily life, though teams of fronter alters might divide up daily life into more manageable and specialised units such as socialisation, academia, work, and taking care of the body. If the host has spent years unaware of the existence of other alters and the trauma that created them, the host might have an extremely hard time coming to accept their DID. This alter might be used to viewing themselves as the only entity in their body and will likely at least at first view themselves as the core. This may or may not be correct. According to the theory of structural dissociation, all hosts are apparently normal parts. 
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Protector: Protectors are alters who protect the body, system, host, core, or other specific alters or groups of alters. Physical protectors might take or try to prevent physical abuse or become aggressive in an attempt to defend against physical abuse. Verbal protectors might take verbal abuse or lash back verbally in order to counter verbal abuse. Emotional protectors might take emotional abuse or comfort other alters to soften the effects of emotional abuse. Sexual protectors might take sexual abuse or attempt to instigate sexual abuse in an attempt to feel more in control of the situation. Caretakers are one type of protector and are focused specifically on looking after younger, weaker, or more vulnerable alters. Persecutors are another specific type of protector that are often not seen as such but that work to protect by harming the system themselves in order to avoid outside harm. 
 Persecutor: Persecutors are alters who purposefully harm the body, system, host, core, or other alters, sabotage the system’s goals or healing, or work to assist the system’s abuser(s). Persecutors might hold self hatred or provide an outlet for internalised abusive and negative messages. They may believe that hurting the system or other alters is the only way to control them or teach them how to behave and so prevent further and more extreme abuse from outside abusers. They may be reenacting abuse or trying to ensure that future abuse isn’t more harmful due to being preceded by a period of relatively little abuse. Some persecutor alters are introjects of abusers and may or may not understand that they are not actually the abuser themselves. 
 
 
 
Introject: Introjects are alters who are based off of an outside person or figure. Introjects can be based off a family member or adult caretaker who supported the dissociative child and provided a positive influence on their life, serving as a source of potential positive messages for the child to internalise. Introjects can also be based off of historical or fictional figures that the dissociative child found strong, courageous, heroic, or otherwise worthy of being emulated and internalised. Unfortunately, introjects can also be of abusers. Abusive introjects, unlike more positive introjects, provide no comfort or moral compass for the system. Instead, they reenact trauma and abuse, sometimes reinforcing abusers’ lessons to prevent further abuse but sometimes serving as a permanent component of an internal flashback. Introjects may or may not see themselves as the individual that they represent. Introjects that are based off of media or fantasy characters are clinically and academically acknowledged and have been mentioned in sources such as "The Haunted Self" by Onno van der Hart, Ellert R. S. Nijenhuis, and Kathy Steele. 
 
 
 
Memory Holder: Memory holders are alters who hold memories that are usually traumatic in nature so that other alters do not have to be confronted by the memories. Other times, memory holders might hold memories of childhood innocence or of being loved by the system’s otherwise abusive or neglectful family. In these latter cases, the memory holder might serve to preserve these memories untainted by memories of trauma or to avoid confronting the system with the pain of what the abuse has cost them. Memory holders are highly associated with abuse takers, alters who experience trauma so that other alters do not have to. 
 
 
 
Gatekeeper: A gatekeeper is an alter who controls switching or access to front, access to inside or certain areas inside, or access to certain alters or memories. The existence of a gatekeeper is highly stabilizing for a system because gatekeepers can to some extent prevent unwanted switching, failure to switch when necessary, or failure to switch to the correct alter. They can help to prevent traumatic memories from bleeding from the alters who hold them to alters who could not yet handle them. They might police the boundaries between subsystems. Because gatekeepers have control over which alters have access to front, they themselves are often or always near front and so witness everything that happens to the system. They might experience vast amounts of abuse and might present as ageless, emotionless, and nonhuman as a way to process this and cope. Gatekeepers may or may not also serve as an internal self helper. 
 
 
 
Internal Self Helper: An internal self helper is an alter who holds vast amounts of knowledge about the system, alters, trauma, and/or internal workings. For those who believe in cores, internal self helpers are often viewed as the first alter to be created or as the normally pseudo-separate internal voice of logic and reason that all people possess. For those who subscribe to the theory of structural dissociation, internal self helpers are often viewed as observing parts or hidden observers, both less than distinct states. Internal self helpers may or may not also serve as a gatekeeper. 
 
 
 
Fragment: A fragment is an alter that is not fully differentiated or developed. Fragments may exist to carry out a single function or job, to hold a single memory or emotion, or to represent a single idea. Depending on the way that individual systems use the term, a fragment might be any alter that could not survive if left on its own or that could not pass for a fully developed individual without the help of other alters. Fragments usually have not been exposed to enough complex, different, or interactive experiences to incorporate more into their sense of self and so become more developed and differentiated. It is possible for fragments to develop into more elaborate alters if the need arises or with further use. 
 It is important to remember that different systems have different needs, and systems may or may not have one or more alter for each of the above jobs. In smaller systems particularly, alters might hold multiple roles, some of which may even at first seem contradictory. For example, an alter might be persecutory to the system yet strive to protect it from outsiders. Other alters might hold roles that are specific to the system and would be difficult to define or generalize. Alters may hold unexpected roles, such as a child part handling finances or presenting in a persecutory manner. While fragments may be defined by their roles, other parts may be able to act in more complex and less reactive ways. The most well developed alters may be able to handle a wide variety of roles if this becomes necessary for the system's continued functioning. Finally, it should be remembered that an alter's roles can change over time. 
 
"I have an alter who was a persecutor for a long time. A lot of people see persecutors as bad and sometimes even the persecutors themselves see themselves as bad. This alter saw herself as an abuser and carried an awful lot of self hate, but she wasn't bad really because her motives were to protect us even though she wasn't going about it in a very good way. She thought that if she punished us and scared us into 'keeping in line' then other people wouldn't have to hurt us. Eventually she learnt that hurting us wasn't necessary, so now she is trying to learn how to protect us in more healthy ways." 
 
<a href="http://did-research.org/disclaimer/acknowledgements.html"> </a> 
<a href="http://did-research.org/disclaimer/acknowledgements.html"> </a> 
"I am so incredibly tired of people portraying protectors as dangerous. Our protectors saved our life. They stand up for us and ask for our boundaries to be maintained. It's like everyone's constantly telling us that that's not allowed, that we should have allowed the abuse to make us a vulnerable doormat."

I am so incredibly tired of people portraying protectors as dangerous. Our protectors saved our life.

Core: Also known as the original or the original child, the core is considered by some to be the part first born to the body. Some see the core as the owner of the system, the part that has the most …

05 Nov 2018

Cores, or originals, are the part of the self that existed before the other dissociative parts came into being.

Fraser Trevor

Link Author

Title: Cores, or originals, are the part of the self that existed before the other dissociative parts came into being.
Author: Fraser Trevor
Rating 5 of 5 Des:

Cores, or originals, are the part of the self that existed before the other dissociative parts came into being. Sometimes, cores will be t...

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Cores, or originals, are the part of the self that existed before the other dissociative parts came into being. Sometimes, cores will be the only part that is the same age as the body, claims the body’s name, and identifies with the body’s appearance, but hosts may often present in the same or a similar manner. Some cores may not be the same age as the body at all but may have frozen in time after a certain point, leaving their alters to handle their life for them while they retreated inside. Some cores may have more power and sway over their system than any of their alters while other cores may be nothing more than a part who just happened to solidify first. Some cores may be highly protected and shielded by their alters while other cores may be or work with the system’s host. The core may or may not be aware that trauma happened, but they’re unlikely to be emotionally connected and may struggle to accept what the trauma means for them. They may feel that what happened to their alters has nothing to do with their own history and self narrative. 
 Not all systems have any original parts. In cases in which there is no core, it’s likely that trauma began at such a young age that the child never got a chance to integrate in any significantly centralised way before they were required to form different self states to handle different aspects of their life. Often, those with no cores are from a family in which disorganised attachment was the norm. As a child, they could never expect consistent care or safety, and they had to be ready to react in a wide variety of ways without much warning or without any mistakes being allowed for. Other systems have multiple core shards. This is the result of either one core forming but later splitting in such a way that all the new alters identify as the original to an equal degree or of multiple alters forming around the same time and all acting as centralising units of the system. There are some individuals who attempt to force fact to meet theory instead of theory to meet fact. These individuals deny the existence of any cores due to their adherence to the theory of structural dissociation. However, even this theory allows for the existence of cores. "I always thought I was the core, and I went through a real crisis when I discovered I wasn't. It's crazy because I don't think of anyone else in the system as being less important or less real, but realising that I was an alter not the core made me feel like I was less important and less real. I became convinced that I was nothing more than the role I had been created for and lost my identity for a while. Ever since then I've felt insecure because if I was created to take over from a previous host who is no longer active then I'm afraid one day that will happen to me too."

Cores, or originals, are the part of the self that existed before the other dissociative parts came into being.

Cores, or originals, are the part of the self that existed before the other dissociative parts came into being. Sometimes, cores will be the only part that is the same age as the body, claims the bod…

05 Nov 2018

Based on a simple idea that is very important to understand. It is the idea that “intulexia” states of mind ( communication states) can be confused with “child within” states ,

Fraser Trevor

Link Author

Title: Based on a simple idea that is very important to understand. It is the idea that “intulexia” states of mind ( communication states) can be confused with “child within” states ,
Author: Fraser Trevor
Rating 5 of 5 Des:

Based on a simple idea that is very important to understand. It is the idea that “intulexia” states of mind ( communication states) can...

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Based on a simple idea that is very important to understand. It is the idea that “intulexia” states of mind ( communication states) can be confused with “child within” states (child-like states), resulting in erroneous views about spirituality, and issues related to responsibility. In many models of developmental psychology and spirituality, three basic levels are recognized. Those are: 1) Pre-ego (roughly birth to age 2 or so) 2) Ego (roughly from age 2 on, with the development of language skills) 3) Trans-ego (possible in adults who commit to working on themselves) One of the meanings of “trans” is “beyond”. When we commit to a spiritual path (in whatever form) we are basically attempting to “wake up” to our higher nature — or, to go “beyond the ego”. But what does this really mean? First, it helps to ask, what is the ego? Basically, it is the sense of separate identity — “me”, “mine”, etc. The ego is basic to individual development and is not inherently bad in itself. In fact, it is necessary for both survival, and individuation (recognizing who we are in distinction to others). Something can be initially known only in contrast to something that it is not. For example, a white dot with no border around it placed on an equally white background will not be visible — for all intents and purposes, it does not exist. But a white dot on a black background immediately leaps into appearance. In the psychological realm, the ego is what provides this basic contrast. “I am me, and you are you, therefore I exist.” As children growing up we had to learn how to separate from our parents (in particular, our mother, as we were originally joined with her body). This is sometimes called the process of “differentiating”. The development of our ego was basic to this process, and thus it is important that a young person develops a “healthy ego”, which means, good boundaries, solid sense of self, good self-esteem, and so on. Problems with ego-development are, however, common, and often make it difficult for someone to embark on a spiritual path, because we cannot begin to go “beyond” the ego if we have not first developed it in a healthy fashion. This is why many who begin to work on themselves have to do some form of psychotherapy (whether spiritually oriented, or more conventional forms) in order to heal and integrate old wounds, forgive parents or siblings, come to terms with their family history, their self-esteem, and so on. Failure to come to a reasonable degree of healing with our past (in particular, our family roots), and with our basic sense of personal identity, increases the likelihood of falling prey to the “pre-trans fallacy”. That is, venturing into spiritual practices and beginning to confuse altered states of consciousness that can arise from such practices with early-life memories of “oneness” (like being merged with what was around us), along with an abandoned sense of responsibility, precisely because we desire to relive our childhood in a way that we think will get us what we didn’t get back then. Spiritual states of mind do indeed include a sense of “oneness”, but they do not abdicate our basic sense of identity. We do not lose the ability to recognize our own name, and thereby successfully answer the phone or reply to an email (for example). More to the point, we do not abandon responsibility, and all the areas of life in which that is important. Likewise, concerning the role of “rationality” on the spiritual path, there is also much confusion. Trans-ego states of being (deep connection with others, or life, or the universe, deep peace/joy, etc.) are non-rational, which can lead to the belief that all rational states are therefore non-spiritual. From there, it is a short leap to assuming that all non-rational states are therefore spiritual. This however ignores the fact that pre-rational states are different from trans-rational states. That is, the “oneness” felt by a child is not the same as the “oneness” experienced by a mature, responsible adult. The former is more a state of “fusion”. The latter is a state of deep connectedness in which the ability to use the mind (or personal identity) is not lost. The main difference between ordinary rationality, and the rationality of trans-ego states, is that in the latter there is less identification with thought. It’s not that the mind becomes non-functional or somehow disappears, it’s rather that we come to recognize, more and more, that we are not our thoughts, anymore than we are our body. But recognizing that we are not the body does not mean that we abandon the body, mistreat it, or pretend that it is not real (or “not spiritual”). Likewise with the mind. For those who are heavily identified with the mind (common in academia, for example) there is a tendency to dismiss all spiritual states of being as “pre-rational”, that is, a type of regression to immature, self-absorbed states of being. This was one deficiency in Freud’s views, for example, as he saw all spiritual states of mind as a regression to an infantile oceanic state of oneness with the mother. That is also pre-trans fallacy; in this case, confusing post-ego states with pre-ego states, and in so doing, dismissing all spirituality as a childish attempt to avoid being a responsible adult (or “navel gazing”, is it is sometimes derogatorily referred to). Contrarily, it’s common in new age or personal growth communities to develop anti-intellectualism, by confusing pre-rational states with trans-rational, and thereby assuming that any non-rational state must be spiritual — even though many non-rational states are actually highly egocentric or narcissistic (self-absorbed), not to mention simply disturbed (pathological). The natural development from ego to trans-ego is a process of transcending and including. That is, the mind and sense of individuality, along with the capacity for responsibility, are not abandoned, they are rather included on the journey, even as we deepen our sense of who we really are, and orient ourselves toward greater wisdom and compassion and skilful ability to help others. 
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Based on a simple idea that is very important to understand. It is the idea that “intulexia” states of mind ( communication states) can be confused with “child within” states ,

Based on a simple idea that is very important to understand. It is the idea that “intulexia” states of mind ( communication states) can be confused with “child within” states (child-like states), re…

05 Nov 2018

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INTULEXIA the birth of the child within.

Intulexia We can get the mind used to anything

I am so incredibly tired of people portraying protectors as dangerous. Our protectors saved our life.

Cores, or originals, are the part of the self that existed before the other dissociative parts came into being.

Based on a simple idea that is very important to understand. It is the idea that “intulexia” states of mind ( communication states) can be confused with “child within” states ,

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